100 thoughts on “my wife left me. (“How success destroyed us”)

  1. So “success ruined us” because
    – She had enough money that she didn’t have to rely on you
    – You couldn’t make her happy anymore by spoiling her
    – The money was the best part about you

  2. Please Notice This Tech lead
    Money will not make you happy! Yes you have a lot of money, but the question is are you happy?? You know, I don't know why a type of person like you always working for money, when you die, you cannot bring your money above there! Here in Ph, we don't have a lot of money, yes we are poor.. but I go to school, we're COMPLETE, happy and contented.. We just want calmness and peace.

    Sorry for my bad english

  3. "My personal value of money may have not grown in proportion of success I may have reached". I feel you on that.. Growing up dirt poor gives you a different prospective on a value of a dollar.

  4. We're only hearing one side but it sounds like that rig was going into the rhubarb one way or another. Money or no money

    My bit is take money out of the equation and imagine you both living a life somewhere in the middle or lower middle class. If you imagine that beautifully and well then this is worth spending time on. Otherwise thank you (mean it) for the honest and open video but now its time love your child move on with your life (end of story)

  5. How many times you equate money and "success" with love in this short item? If you live until you're 80, you've less than 30k days to realise that love + time = success. Everything else is chasing the wind.

  6. Money is useless! Most of our problems come from money and greed! Unfortunately, our societies have been created around a system that is too dependent on money. Systems normally exist in equilibrium, but the banks have created an unbalanced system. Governments can only bail so much using the taxpayer's money, this system is struggling, change is coming…

  7. …and maybe you're just crappy in developing/keeping relationships. I am being single for most of my life and I tend to blame lack of success/money in contrast to your story… The truth is out there.

  8. @TechLead it’s never too late. First I’m sorry you’re wife left. Sad the number of divorces each and every day. But you are not yet divorced.
    I went through a bad divorce and I had a teen daughter and younger son. Like you I wanted to be there for them.
    Seek help, Me I live in LA with no other family so lucky I turned to church. Not lucky it was a blessing. At least you have the means to seek help if not for yourself do it for your son. May God Bless you and guide your heart.

  9. You are smart computer guy. You know how to solve problems. Analyze what happend and go on debugging mode. There is a lot of help outside there if they are important you will know how to solve the issue. Identify what was wrong and work the solution. I wish you the best.

  10. I rarely comment on YouTube vids but this was so moving! I'm praying for you man. My heart breaks for your marriage and for your son. As a guy working in tech, I think about family constantly. Thanks for sharing this!! 🙏

  11. You probably see me commenting a lot but I'm compelled to do so anytime I see a shell of a mediavirus. "How success destroyed" us in itself is the shell of the virus. That's why people click because its self-contrading. If it destroyed your relationship then it's not success by default regardless of the money it made you. We don't lead successful lives not having a functional relationship with our partners. You were monetarily successful by society's standards but failed at succeeding a healthy relationship which is questionably far more important than monetary success. Monetary success becomes a failure once it destroyed your family and love life. I'm sure every case is very specific and a plethora of events happened before this unfortunate event happened to you. Sorry to hear that. I guess try your best to somehow have an impact on their lives. Nothing is lost it's suspended you got fired but with hope of regaining your position. Don't be too proud to beg to get her back. Especially if you were more at fault than her. That I cannot evaluate…

  12. One thing I recognize is you think about wealth so much I think you're clouding your own view. You obviously had poor communication so not everything was perfect…

  13. Pride took at the end. Fight as hard for them as you did for your career and you get her back and your child but you wouldn't even consider just moving to Japan and fighting like a real father is supposed to. You should have seen my father fighting I don't see you fighting I see you gave up and bottled yourself up. Did you really love her? I have my doubts. My wife and my family do not have to like each other for her or my kids to inherit wealth. I would avoid pairing them that's all. My own family first not my mother or father. My kids and my wife are always above my mother and father and that's not disrespect that logic and real devotion and love you your own family. That's a huge error in asian culture and many other cultures as well.

  14. Remember to make plans ahead of the holidays to keep yourself occupied so u don't have time feeling down when u c nieces n nephews.

  15. I get that his point is to say 'hey money is not the answer to relationships " and I think that's what happens to all celebrities, which is why there are massive divorces. However, the all miss the point. Money does buy time to get to the hard work of really knowing your partner. When you are poor your are forced to do so. But being rich, you have to actively and get out of your safe zone to do so.

  16. She was s spy who got the tech lead on her resume. If you go to japan then you might be accepted back with conditions relating to tech dev't for japanese corps. Much of the tech sector is a political tool. Aussie is occupied by chinese tech politics spies.

    Wife is done. Sure you are to have nice affair in japan on arrival. Business is your life. Even if they did not tell you. Its not tech for tech. Its the same kings and barons and spies and dirty tricks. Encrypt everything and find the way in from the cold. Bond tech bond.

    My idea is that you get a work visa. Have a japan legal clerk fix it for you.. And you dont lose anything too much after work review looks ok. Knowing the osi stack and framework NOT awk or whatever pattern design trick means nothing really. You are just a tinker toy with misguided dreams. The money is no longer a commodity. You are alone son.

    Did she learn alot about inside working at google?. Why are you telling about coding review tips? Did you get clients? Ever hear of non disclosure of work related property. I would give it a moment before the time comes when it comes back to bite. Good films

  17. On the flip side of things, now some drunk loser ESL teacher in Japan is fucking your wife and dropping his load inside her tight snapper….all on your dime

  18. Your insecurity makes you read my comments I know that and you going to be at home in your empty life with your empty soul and empty mind and think : "These haters are just jealous" nah dawg I'd rather die than be you. Nobody who got a good mind and who's soul's intact would actually want anything you have. You are a reflection of modern society Mr. Personality disorder…

  19. Book recommendation : The 5 Languages of Love. If you care to make up for the mess you partly created and understand why she didn't respond to your gifts. That was not her love language AT ALL. Respect your wife dude. It's a shame.

  20. WTF your parents wealth can't get to your wife because they can't get along ? Do you realize YOUR PRIMARY FAMILY IS NOW YOUR WIFE AND SON ? Goodness most in laws don't get along anyway, who will get your parents money then ? Your fish ? How CHEAP of you, no wonder she left, you put your parents above your child's MOTHER, your life partner. No wonder she doesn't want to see you again. It's not about THE MONEY, since she doesn't care about your freaking inheritance, it's about HER POSITION. How would you feel if her parents disrespected you and she told you to get over it cause she gotta inherit their wealth ? You have no COMMON SENSE dude.

  21. I believe if you worship your abusive parents because they have money you're a coward. I knew and asian whose father was rich, but mean and controlling, he cut him off and started everything from scratch. He did go through hard times, even homeless but guess what, he made a life for himself and makes plenty of money now. Dignity is not something you can buy. I respect YOUR WIFE more than I do you. I find your mindset insane.

  22. So sorry to hear what has had happened,
    Perhaps your wife just wants your time, and attention.

    Read 5 love languages by Gary Chapman, it helped me in the past.
    Relationship goes both ways, perhaps the book will help you to identify and give you clarity.

    & Time will heal everything. Stay Strong 😀

  23. Dude, you just married a japanese woman.

    What did you expect?! Love?!

    They are famous for marrying only and motivated by the biggest wallet.

  24. I don’t know much about this guy. It seems like his intelligence has taken him to a good place. On the emotional intelligence spectrum this guy looks like he is still in a 101 class

  25. This is why i dont take a gf anymore, people stug together in the old days but socialistic governemts have made it really easy for women to have a choice, leave the man when they want, then collect allamony and live of government subisidies. Its not coming out of the blue sky that my parents generation started to divorce. 'It was a generaltional thing'… no its not, its goverment policy on the left to break the family structur, just as under communism the state was your parent rather then your biological ones. Ps she sounds like a golddigger. A present is a geasture of kindness, the fact that the pricetag isnt high enough suggest her money hunger. I serious doubt if it would have worked even if you were poorer. Most wives leave their husbands when there is a financial downfall like losing a job, especially coz governments have made that very simple for them.

  26. Welcome to modern civilization where women have been allowed to completely absolve themselves of all personal accountability to their spouse and children. Ownership has been redefined and gratitude has gone out the window because of this. I will never marry without an ironclad prenup that holds her accountable forever.

  27. Janpanese women tipically give up their careers after getting marrieds, so they hope you make the same degree sacrifice, e.g. spending all your income…

  28. Sorry,I'm only 1:48 into this but I have to comment. Your wife is extremely selfish and hurtful to KIDNAP your son and leave the country with him. You should file a police report if that's what it takes to wake her up and bring her back. She can't just abandon you and take your son like he's her property.you are right when you say your son was the victim and we should be sorry for him. It takes guts and courage to look passed stupid family issues for the best of the family but she failed there. That's what everybody does, no family is perfect with every person being thoughtful and forgiving but out of real love and concern she should not have bailed on you. So now she is holding you hostage? You have to find a nice place or else she doesn't return? She's weak and dissapointing. Sorry but when everything is good, everyone's an angel. When life gets tough that's when you know who you're dealing with. Maybe you could blame Facebook? First they destroyed your marriage and then they fired you…ok so it's not their fault, why did you take the job? Did you understand the situation you'd be stepping into regarding your living environment? Did you ever have an idea your wife was fragile and couldn't handle your parents? We're your parents too demanding and judgmental? I only ask these out of respect to you since you always state the issues and questions in a brutally honest fashion…I wish you the best and don't give up on your son!!!

  29. I know many people shy away these days from "judging" others (especially judging women), but what his wife did seems like a clear case of kidnapping. If so, she is a kidnapper and deserves criminal prosecution. If I'm correct and I was him, I would be doing everything I could do to legally win back FULL custody of my son; whether she kidnapped the kid or not.

  30. Here are some main points: I’m praying for you man I know this happens a lot
    1. Provides an escape (don’t have to go through hard times and bond together)
    2. Small acts of kindness means significantly less
    3. Makes it a a big part of you in partners eyes (forget why you love someone and why you fell in love)
    4. Very easy to solve problems or put the core issue on the back burner (THIS ONE IS SO TRUE) hide issues with things you can do with money “to make up for it”. Money is not the solution to all problems
    5. Makes dealing with parents and in laws hard (either guilty or no trust)
    6. Money alone doesn’t guarantee happiness.

  31. Didn’t hear anything about the other love languages: quality time, words of affirmation, touch, acts of service (non $ related)….

  32. 4:00 dude I'm poor and my girl would shit on me if I only got her a $30 gift. Last year I bought her $300 sun glasses and she still wasn't happy.

  33. I'm sad for you, I hope that when the pain of the separation will be behind you there will be a place for love between you and your son and friendship between you and the mother of your son.

  34. we have been sold "lifestyles" and sometimes it gets in the way of real life..pray things will settle down for all in good time

  35. Life itself is a rollercoaster. Add two separate worlds collaborating till the death. What's interesting is he had it all and his marriage failed. The flip side of the coin is the percentage of marriages that failed due to financial difficulties is just as high, or probably higher. I guess there's a sweet spot somewhere center that those who aspire marriage must find for their union to thrive.

  36. Your perspective on life is unique. Your wife didn’t get it. Maybe she just wanted something else, and you couldn’t provide it. Maybe she just wasn’t in love or didn’t love you. Move on, guy. Find someone who gets you

  37. Great content, But Having to deal with infidelity is to make sure you are not just assuming your partner is cheating, as a policy , don't say they are cheating until you have gathered proof of their act, confrontation without evidence is just unacceptable, i contacted @brandhackers1 on Instagram and on WhatsApp on +19163042321. i was in the eye of the storm with my now Ex , i saw all her mails, WhatsApp messages, Kik and even pictures she exchanged with her lover, but it was easier at the end really, having proof helps lot.

  38. Sorry about your boy Tech Lead. I have a son too and I can't imagine if they were taken from me. I would track her down and get the boy back

  39. Hey brother. Marry the Lord Jesus Christ. He is preparing His bride right now brother. It happen to me as well more than once also have a child 8 years old. I now code to supply everyday needs and preach when ever I can. No I don’t belong to a church nor go to any. I get thrown out due to their positive think gospel of self. No one want to deny their lives or want to pick up theirs cross nor consider the days they are living in. The Lord my dearest friend is at the door. Great devastation is coming comets falling to earth to wake up a sleeping church. When you see this repent and accept the risen Lord as your Saviour. Time is short. Don’t worry about Mathis world for it is passing away. Soon the chip will be inserted in people which is the mark of the beast. It will change your dna compliments of the UN, bill gates and big pharma. It’s called ID2020. Soon there will be a huge shift and transition and out of chaos the antichrist will arise. All that are not in the Lord will be mesmerized by him and he will lead many into bondage and then hell. For whoever takes this mark will not be able to be saved due to it changing your dna. You become a hybrid and therefore unredeemable. Just please look at the care of your soul in a time where it’s a low or no priority in most people lives. Stay out of the churches they are given over to the enemy for sifting. Just read the word. Start with John and then read revelations and then read romans. God bless you and grant your super grace and thank you for the tech clips they have been awesome to say the least.

  40. you may have high iq but you have double digit emotional or eq. you forget women are women and they're not meant to earn money. they're meant to care for others in ways you fail to notice clearly. you probably think you dont need one. im amazed you convinced one to have a child with you. this child shouldnt be anywhere near you though. That's harsh i guess, but at least you lost your job for making this distasteful channel.

  41. 500k a Year and you got her a 30 dollar birthday present..hahaha I know it's not the point and your explaining you didn't realize the pay to success to gift ratio..but she sure did..lol

  42. Do you get to see your son and how much?..that's the only function in your
    <p>code </p> you need to make your program run for the rest of your life..nothing else matters

  43. You know, I dated a person that has turned out extremely successful and knew that they would from our dating days except they die early. For some reason, the mom just did not like me and would find ways to create issues and everytime I had to ask forgiveness and it was exhausting. One thing that never left my mind was if we pursued a permanent relationship and that he'd pass before me, what would become of me and his mother? a family is a form of protection ( at least I believe it is). I did not want to be one of those in constant conflict, I find a lot of marital successes are also aided by the fact that both sides of the family ( at least the parents) have mutual respect for each other and a common goal to see their kids ( us) succeed by all means necessary. I put an end to that relationship, as difficult as that was. Years later I have no regrets. @TechLead, maybe the idea of having that wealth flow to the child instead of her is what did not sit well but I hope she will have a change of heart so you can at least see the kid. Not many women will take care of the family and watch their partner become successful only to be told they will get no money out of it, when they could also pursue their own success, it is a hard pill to swallow. I hope the best comes out of all this.

  44. U always want ur ex wife to act knowledge that u are successful person but don’t want to share ur success (only buy her $30 gift). Lol what’s ur logic? I have seen a successful couple and they share everything including material wealth. May be u need to evaluate urself that u are selfish in a relationship and cheapo?

  45. @TeachLead Man, you were a blue simp, and mangina, a cuckold. You never saw it coming. She has sexual needs and she looked it in White American and Black American men.

  46. @TeachLead East Asian and Caucasian are golden diggers. Love for women and from women is a propaganda. Thus, I advice you go to your own way.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *